A pack of wild dogs attacked and killed a goat and wounded two other animals at a home in Meansville Feb. 5. The homeowner said about a dozen dogs of all ages and breeds attacked the animals in the pasture behind his home.
Three animals were attacked by a large pack of wild dogs on Collier Avenue in downtown Meansville.
Problem solved.
There is no need for another law. Everybody wants to make a new law for this or that.
BUT, We must act fast. As soon as you take one out...the sympathy vote will be all over you like "white on old timey non-maternity wedding dresses."
"Well its like this, my pit bull Killer was not really a bad dog. He was real good on the inside. He only ate kids when his bi-polar symptoms went south. The kids ask for it. They should not have been in their yards after school. He started running with the wrong crowd. He did not even drink at all until we moved to Meansville. Now poor Killer is addicted to that old MD 20/20. He stole my credit card but he didn't really mean to. He was just drunk and hanging with the wrong pack. I finally got Killer neutered too. I just could not afford any more Grandpuppies. After he was neutered, he just sit around licking his genitals when he wasn't youngun hunting.
He was licking his genitals one day and my crazy Uncle Clark said, "I wish I could do that. Then my crazier Uncle Lewis said, 'THAT DOG WILL BITE you."
I miss my uncles Lewis and Clark, they done alot of expeditions together.
-Ref: Lewis Grizzard-
News articles of this magnitude of violence make it extremely difficult for this old geezer to sleep at night.
I'm fearful this roving gang of murderers will not be sated by gorging themselves on Pike County goats and cows. They may choose to expand their killing fields to Lamar County seeking more palatable provisions.
I predicted these serial killings and will explain: I refer you to this recent article from the PCJR:
*FOSTER DOG MEET AND GREET*
Posted by Rachel McDaniel in Top Stories
Tuesday, January 25. 2011
"Friends of Pike County Animals will hold a foster dog meet and greet Wednesday, Jan. 26 at Pike Depot from noon to 2 p.m." "We invite folks to come out and meet dogs and puppies fostered by members of FPCA that are available for adoption," said Tara Cotton. "This meet and greet will be held in conjunction with our spay/neuter clinics."
My lovely wife, Sueme, and I drove over to the Pike Depot intending to adopt a cute homeless puppy to replace our beloved chihuahua named Baby Sam who recently passed away from being mangled by our neighbor Barack's vicious pit bull named Bad Brutus. He was a very agressive dog...with the key word being "was", because Bad Brutus is graveyard DEAD! The bad brute succumbed to an extreme case of lead poisoning after I calmly corrected big Bad Brutus's bad behavior by pumping 10 .45 Cal.rounds into his overly muscled body. Barack meekly apologized to Sueme and me and all is forgiven in the neighborhood
Sorry, stay with me, I was almost overcome with grief just thinking of that bad memory. ~sniff~ ~sniff~
As I stated, it was predictable some horrible and terrifying events were in Pike County's future the minute we pulled into the parking lot of the Pike Depot and realized everything was not as it should have been. Pouting and skulking near the entrance was a menacing gang of mongrel curs backed up by their brazen bitches howling for their studs to tear us apart. This pack of wild animals could have been easily mistaken for short legged Hells Angels with long tails wearing fur coats of assorted colors similar to the wild California bunch.
It appeared their mis-directed anger towards the arriving adopters could have been caused as a result of the pack not being among those lucky dogs chosen to be adopted by good families. We were scared for a moment and then I whipped out my trusty Glock 21 and ala Hambone style, I gave them a "looka here", "looka here", moment and furrowed the parking lot with a few well placed slugs to scare the wild gang away.
Even with them being the toughest gang in Pike County, they realized they were over matched. With tucked tails and drooping ears, they eagerly beat feet down the lonely road. On the way back to Barnesville, we saw this same wild bunch dejectedly strung along Chapman Road apparantly on their way to safety in Meansville.
Writing about these poor lost dogs has been soulfully cathartic for me. I now realize these poor foresaken creatures of God are trying only to survive in this bad obamma economy. Give 'em help! They need a break!
Everyone should understand this roving pack is misunderstood, mistreated and most likely were abused as puppies. They are NOT to blame for their wanton ways. These dogs need compassion and understanding just like the folks at DFACS are supposed to provide to the abused kids in their charge. Maybe if a few of the surviving Meansville founders banded together like they did a 100 years ago, they could encourage the younger Meansvillians to gently bring in those abandoned nomadic pets and counsel them to be loving and productive family members again. Work together Meansville and you can accomplish the impossibe!
I apologize for rambling on with this needed to be told personal tale. This has been a true story. HONEST!
Call N. Alcars
'going down to the pound tomorrow and adopt a dawg'
The good Lord is going to bless you young lady. I bet you must keep that Call on a lease in order to keep him in control.
My sister was the biggest pet lover EVER. She owned a black pekinese named Gizmo. She would get it shaved each year in the summer with the exception of a mohawk 'do' and a ball on the end of his tail. She put gold chains on Gizmo and took pictures of him. He looked like Mr.T.
Those things are not pets. They are hairy thugs that do not need a license to kill.
I'm sure Pike County's Meansvillians appreciate you taking an active role in the fight against the dogmestic terrier-ists. When you alluded to the fact the liberal element of the Democrat majority provided a social welfare agenda for the terrier-ists ..."they are taken care of by the owners, shelter or housing is provided, medical bills paid for them and plenty of free food...you elevated yourself to Glenn Beck status with your insightful analysis. Keep up the fight! Ruff! Ruff!
Call N. Alcars
'be on the look out for radical suicide doggists'
"it's my guess that these are not "wild" dogs at all but uncontrolled animals that live in the neighborhood and have owners.'
You are partially correct FBT. When you wrote these were not "wild" dogs, you are correct. They are not "wild" in terms of being forced to survive in the woods. These are well groomed intelligent "sleeper dogs" who have assimilated themselves into our communities pretending to be hound dogs, lap dogs, show dogs, yard dogs, guard dogs, etc. In reality these innocent appearing dogs are part of a radical home-grown 'canine terrier-ist cell' funded by religious zealots from the Middle East and have no owners. In the neighborhoods, they are undercover and may be known as Fido, Spot, Ol' Blue or even Fluffy. In reality they are El Fido Zaha, Al Spot Shadiyah, Barack bashir-blu and Fatima flufi feroz. If you think, "once a few are put down", will stop these extremist radical canines, you are mistaken. They casually stroll among us ready to mount an invasion in the name of Dogallah. Make sure you stay safe and ever vigilant my fat friend.
Alley-yakbark!..Alley-yakbark! Alley-yelp!
Call N. Alcars
'spreading the truth about radical dogism"
sracla n llac.
Kill-em-all. If anyone should be so stupid as to come forward and claim one of the "wild ones." Don't forget to remind them of all those vet bills that you have been collecting.
Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog the scene never changes.
-Lewis Grizzard-
Lil' Albert Alcars
"after Grampa & Nana Sueme, I'm Sheila's next favorite "
My, my...I was so proud. Everybody was out of step except my Lil' Albert.
And those sista fried pig ears at that hoedown are always a treat worth going back for. Umm, umm good!
lets neuter the people who allow their animals to breed uncontrolled and then dump them out for someone else to care for.
well mr clever mayhem, you happen to be the only resident of Dumb---ville. you the dog catcher too?
The dog will feel the shock, but he's over the line so fast it's over and forgotten until he tries to get back into his own yard. Then the shock collar can prevent the dog from returning to his own yard, and is left to roam the neighborhood.
If the dog was hit by a car, perhaps he'd gotten out, was hit by a car, the driver stopped to see if the dog was alive, found it was dead and took the collar. It happens.
Nothing replaces a good old fashioned fence.
You don't know what a dog does all day when it's left at home alone, especially one that young.
By the way - if the power goes out, even for a minute, the dog can get out. If the power comes back when he's out, he can't get back in.
Tell your lazy son (who obviously didn't read the material that comes with the underground fence) to get a real fence before he gets another dog. You don't leave a dog that young outdoors unsecured. It's not trained yet.